A Very Serious Reminder for On Simplicity Readers

Posted on September 08th, 2009 in Happiness, House & Home

Life is serious business. There are bills to be paid, friends and family to attend to, and jobs to be done. That’s all essential. Focusing only on the essential can be a lifesaver when you’re in a stressful situation. But the rest of the time, it can simply make your world very small.

And as my husband says when I screw something up, “Go big or go home.” A small world is not good for big minds. And we all have big minds that need room to run and grow. There’s really only one solution: have some fun. Again, in a much larger and therefore more serious font:

Have some fun.

Have Fun in Your Closet

A few items have jumped out at me recently along these lines. Nina Garcia’s new book, The Style Strategy, was a fantastic reminder of this. Even the essential (ie, wearing clothes in public [please, people!]) can be filled with fun and esprit. I love how Nina Garcia embraces the idea that you should be making occasional mistakes and missteps in your clothing choices. It’s not the end of the world, and it means that you’re likely staying out of the ruts you might otherwise tread for life. It’s nice to know that some of the ridiculously stupid things I’ve put on my body weren’t a total waste!

Have Fun in Your Home

Here was another nice reminder that fun is important: Daisy Cottage. I love this blog! The ever-inspirational Ms. Kim takes great pride in her refusal to tone down the happiness in her home. (At least that’s how it appears to me…) This blog is great to read when you find yourself becoming overly concerned about something non-essential. Your chairs don’t match your couch? Big deal. You have a secret obsession with dollhouses? Embrace it. Life should be fun and filled with things you love, regardless of whether they fit with your lifestyle or image. If you need a dose of style and spunk, please visit Daisy Cottage for a wake-up call of the best kind.

Have Fun When No One (or Everyone) Is Looking

Finally, one more reminder to have some fun:

In a world where the Carlton dance exists, life can never truly be hopeless. I adore Carlton probably more than anyone should love a second-tier fictional sitcom character. I just can’t resist a man who stands up for plaid and Tom Jones, despite public scorn. (I would however, like to speak with him regarding the evils of pleated pants…) It’s easy to be yourself when everyone loves you; despite his multitude of douchey cringe-inducing moments, Carlton is unafraid to be himself, regardless of the costs. He simply can’t resist!

P.S.: I had a hard time choosing from the clip above and this one. In the end, tap dancing on Soul Train won the day. Please enjoy.

Thanks for indulging me a bit today, folks. I hope you find a way to add some fun to your life each and every day, starting with today.

This post has 15 comments

stella
September 8th, 2009
First, loved your Carlton clips. I, too, loved that character, far more than even the Will Smith main one. It was FUN watching those clips. Thank you.

When I need a visual fun stimulus, I put on just about any episode of Third Rock From the Sun and just roar. Instant laughter. The genius of the writing and the physical comedy has me roaring.

Or I call up a friend and find some way to get her to laugh as her laughter is just an automatic feel good thing.

Fun to me is experimenting with just about anything, regardless of the results. A new recipe, a new way of dressing, a new activity.

Although I agree, we all need to have fun, especially these days, I’m not sure I agree with your premise of why we need it:

And as my husband says when I screw something up, “Go big or go home.” A small world is not good for big minds. And we all have big minds that need room to run and grow. There’s really only one solution: have some fun”

Our minds do indeed need space/room to run and grow, but sometimes that comes from things that are anything but fun–or perhaps don’t feel like fun in the process. I don’t think fun, or happiness, is central to real growth. Because sometimes being fun and happy comes from being comfortable and complacent.

It’s easy to get caught up in the whole, if we love something, if we’re passionate about something, it should be FUN. Life should be FUN! Working is rarely “fun” in the classic sense–nor should it be (even when you do what you love), but it can be pleasurable and satisfying and other really good stuff. Desired results (think painting something) can be fun, even if the process isn’t.

Personally, I’m always hesitant about exhortations to “have fun” especially when voiced by co-workers and clients. In my professional experience, the folks who focus on having fun are generally those who make work much more problematic for others than it need be because they’re too busy having fun to do the actual work required.

It’s hard to have fun in an office, for example, where fun-loving co-workers leave work early to go out drinking (to build team spirit, no less!) without finishing work needed for the next day and leaving others in the lurch, or clients who are out having fun are too busy doing that to provide access or necessary products, information, etc. and you miss deadlines.

You know what’s fun? Working with people who take pride in what they do, regardless of what it is, and are joyous in doing a job well, regardless of what they’re paid. They work well because that’s what you do. These people are fun because when you’re not worrying about whether people will do the job and you can meet your own deadlines, you can relax and be open to having fun with them. (You think that sharing drinks makes me like you more when you messed up a project by being late for a deadline? NOT.)

Not expressing this well, but the push for having fun just pushes my buttons.

Real fun is spontaneous and unbidden, although we can create a “garden” in our lives where it is nurtured and welcomed and celebrated.

Fun is sharing life with people one trusts and respects, at work and in one’s private life.

And being open to the moments of connection amidst chaos and craziness that often seem to rule.

What we need to be open to is the many forms that “fun” takes. Cause it’s not always the obvious.

Same thing with “happiness.” We need to define both in our own lives and to accept that neither can be present in every moment, even though they are ALWAYS present. (A bit zen.)

The “happiest” person I know, when questioned about why he was so happy and fun-loving said: I do not think about either nor do I think I am either. I just get up and make the best of whatever happens and I show up and am open to things.

I treasure fun moments and happiness precisely because every moment is not one big happy smiley face. Nor would I want it to be.

As always, I love the place you come from–all heart–in giving us gentle reminders on how to just keep it simple so we can enjoy life more.
Positively Present
September 8th, 2009
Love this post! Having fun is so important and I think sometimes it gets lost in all of the other elements of life. Great video… Carlton had me cracking up, having fun right here at my boring ol’ desk!
Positively Present´s last blog ..the difference between happy and not unhappy
Dawn
September 8th, 2009
I agree…you can have fun, in most things that you do…Those are the best moments…

Thanks again for another great post…and for the clips, I do a similar dance when I’m trying to embarass my kids…it works, and totally cracks me up!
Dawn´s last blog ..Overnight in San Antonio~Riverwalk
Lindsay
September 8th, 2009
That made me happy to see that clip again! Thanks for the reminder, it is easy to get wrapped up in the act of making everything perfect and forget to just have fun!
Lindsay´s last blog ..Tweaks of the palate
Daisy Cottage
September 8th, 2009
THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!
Awesome site – YOU are very inspiring!
xo
Kim
Daisy Cottage´s last blog ..Lori’s House
Wilma Ham
September 8th, 2009
For me fun is joy and joy strengthens the heart and relaxes the mind.
The heart is important as it guides life, is a creative force in life and is love. Without love life is not well lived, so yes having fun and joy is time well spent.
Wilma Ham´s last blog ..Forget unfair and luck, integrity is what counts.
Bucksome
September 8th, 2009
Without seeing the video in the email version of this post, I knew you were referencing Carleton of “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air”.

Thank you for this article to remind us the importance of fun and joy in our lives.
Bucksome´s last blog ..Is Your Partner Financially Compatible?
Ricardo Bueno
September 9th, 2009
It’s been a long day today. A productive, somewhat stressful (but I got over it, day. That clip with Carlton cracked me up!!!

Re: “Have Fun When No One (or Everyone) Is Looking”

Sara, you gotta have fun in life. At work, at home, in general. Love what you do, enjoy the company you have and just have some good ol’ plain fun. Otherwise, what the heck are we doing?

I’ve learned to embrace moments in life (even the challenging, and stressful ones) with an air of positive thought and relaxation. It helps and it makes me more productive. And it gets me through even the most difficult of moments too.

Hope you have an awesome Wednesday!
Ricardo Bueno´s last blog ..Building A Good Writing Habit
Tess The Bold Life
September 9th, 2009
I loved Carlton however didn’t know who he is. I guess I don’t watch enough TV. The Daisy Cottage photos were way to cluttered for me.
But that’s what’s great about our life we can spend our time doing what we want, decorating how we want and have fun doing it. Thanks for the reminder sometimes I get waaayyyy to intense!
Tess The Bold Life´s last blog ..Notice Anything?
Sara
September 9th, 2009
Stella, thanks for such a thoughtful response. There’s definitely a flip side to all this, and you spell it out very clearly. I very much agree with the caveat you bring up: fun at someone else’s expense is the opposite of healthy and beneficial. But when the details are small, that’s where I’m trying to add some fun. Doing my absolute best on the job is exhausting; making room for ridiculous fun in non-essential areas of life is a decent balance. I seriously appreciate the thoughtful comments and love your “happy” friend’s take on things. (So simple!)
Nimit kashyap
September 9th, 2009
Nice Article, keep up the good work.

Now lets have fun!!!!
Nimit kashyap´s last blog ..Turmeric is the Secret Tip for Colon Cleanse
Emily
September 9th, 2009
I think, in general, so many people have started to take life and themselves too seriously. Only when we let go, and have fun, is life really being lived. Great reminders. And I love Daisy Cottage too.
Emily´s last blog ..Finding Comfort
Carla
September 9th, 2009
That clip brought back memories and is a great reminder for me that no matter what’s going on, just have fun! I love the Daisy Cottage site and her “not sweating it” style.
Carla´s last blog ..Green and Chic’s most popular posts
Lori Enos
September 15th, 2009
This was a fantasitic article and a true reminder that we should live our lives in the moment and feel the joy. Sometimes we get so caught up in eing perfect and putting on an image that we lose the essence of who we are. I’ve been on a journey to find bliss for the last several months, detailed in my blog, and I’m finding that bliss is in the everyday.
Lori Enos´s last blog ..Zoo Bliss
Miche | Serenity Hacker
September 16th, 2009
I love this post! Using the Carlton dance to illustrate having fun no matter what was awesome! When my niece was young she used to imitate his dance from The Prince of Bel Air and she’d have me cracking up half the night. It’s been so long since I’ve seen it! She’s 16 now and wouldn’t DARE do it anymore… too cool for that kind of fun!

We could definitely all learn a little from Carlton!
Miche | Serenity Hacker´s last blog ..To Really Think Outside the Box, Think Like a Kid