Free to Have Fun: Reclaiming Your Hobbies

Once upon a time, there were things called hobbies. They were meant to be fun pastimes, pleasant ways to spend leisure time. People would (please believe me when I say this) complete activities purely for pleasure. Sometimes, they wouldn’t even finish these hobby projects!
Spend My Free Time Freely? Are You Crazy?
If leisurely hobbies have become a fairy tale for you, I know how you feel. Things I used to do solely for fun, like reading, sewing, dancing, and yes, blogging, have all become infected with an aggressive strain of productivity. Sound familiar? The hobbies you used to engage in to unwind have now become scheduled-in items, with expected results expected and hardcore time commitments. You need another hobby just to get away from your hobbies! The end result is feeling worn thin, and even worse, forgetting how to spend leisure time, well… leisurely.
I had a lightbulb moment this weekend that resulted in a sewing binge that was actually fun. (Context: Other recent sewing projects have involved blood, throwing things, and many, many curse words. Today I only threatened to burn a cummerbund. It took me seriously, complied, and that was that.) Here’s what I figured out in my lightbulb moment, and perhaps a few of these might work for you:
Stop Expecting Results
Progress is good, and skill building is great. Yadda yadda yadda. If you have fun hitting the driving range, then don’t worry about perfecting your swing. If you like to cook, stop stressing that the new recipe you’re trying is going to stink. As soon as we expect a certain quality of results, we’ve turned fun into work. Goals are okay, but try to give yourself a lot of leeway to reach them.
Set Fun as a Goal
Seriously. Tell yourself that as long as you have fun, the activity was a success. Not every moment has to make you a better person. And after all, sometimes you’re a better person just for having had a good laugh. Bottom line: fun counts. This means trashy books, games with no rules, and ugly projects are fair game.
Find Ways to Set Yourself Apart from Professionals

t’s easy to start comparing yourself to pros, whether you’re cooking, sewing, or playing ball. Don’t; it puts unwarranted pressure on you. I had good success in my sewing when I started adding quirks to my projects like weird bobbin thread colors (that’s the color of stitching on the inside of an item). It was like a signal to my brain that, “Hey, we’re just playing around here. You don’t have to be Marc Jacobs.”
You can change the rules of a game, add your favorite ingredient regardless of what the recipe says (dude, fake crab!), or learn indulgent, remixed songs on your instrument. Don’t try to be a pro: find ways to remind yourself it’s okay to just be an amateur.
Experiment with the Intention of Screwing up
Here’s the bonus benefit of this one: we actually learn more when we fail and then figure out what went wrong. You might actually find yourself doing more amazing things than you thought if you allow yourself to fail and goof around with no consequence.
There are two sides to this coin, though, that I’d love to kick up in the comments. Are we giving up on our talents and possibilities when we plan for mediocrity in our hobbies? When should we throw these ideas out and take a hobby to a new level? If you’ve got any ideas to add to the conversation, please dive in!
photo credit: Fevi in Cayman
photo credit: *Atelier Encantado*I






This post has 22 comments
March 16th, 2009
Love this post, especially the part about intentionally screwing up. We have to start realizing that failing in itself is a reward, a gift that helps us succeed the next time when it really counts.
Christopher Laneys last blog post..The Sky’s NOT the Limit
March 16th, 2009
I love the saying from William S. Burroughs, “If a thing’s worth doing, it’s worth doing badly.” Yup, I actually might someday try my hand again at gardening, even though my last experiences with it back when I was a teenager were frightful. But, this time, I’m going in with the understanding that gardening is a lifetime hobby that can take years to master, so I’ll be very patient with myself and see if I enjoy the process of learning through constant trial and error. If I don’t, if it turns out to be too stressful, of course, I won’t continue. But, for the new me, a huge part of the fun of any new endeavor is seeing progress after much effort. So, actually, if it’s too easy, it’s not fun! : )
Shanel Yangs last blog post..15 Awful Truths about Getting Rich
March 16th, 2009
This post is for me. I have this need to make everything I do productive and yield results. I can’t remember the last time I sewed something … just to sew. Great post.
Nicki at Domestic Centss last blog post..Easter Projects Update – Bunny
March 16th, 2009
“Are we giving up on our talents and possibilities when we plan for mediocrity in our hobbies? When should we throw these ideas out and take a hobby to a new level?”
See, for me, the reason I don’t get to the next level in my hobbies is that I don’t risk failing. Your skills only grow when you experiment, play around with them. Play. I made a Lenten resolution to “fail” — i.e., to get out of my comfort zone and try new things.
I guess I’m too competitive. I think doing things well is fun, but messing around with mediocrity isn’t. But if I’m not willing to do something poorly, at first, I’ll never get to have the fun of doing it well!
So I will take your hint and remember to approach my hobbies as fun, and maybe go a step farther and approach my chores as hobbies!
Cheers
Regina
Reginas last blog post..Reflections on Eucharist
March 16th, 2009
Hey Sara,
It’s the self imposed expectations that kill me. No one else expects things to be done to the level I think/know I’m capable of yet when I’m below that level I feel bad. You’re exactly right that hobbies have a way of becoming work and lose the luster that made them fun in the first place.
But I am starting to do things with this saying in mind “it’s about progress not perfection” and it’s helping a lot. Maybe I need a new saying “it’s about making it fun and enjoying the journey not perfection.”???
Sherri (Serene Journey)s last blog post..Love Is A Verb
March 16th, 2009
Thanks for the reminder to just kick back and have some fun. I think it can be fun to try to succeed at things, but as with all of life there must be balance. You are right we should continue to do some things we will never really be good at just because they are fun. For me that is tennis. I stink, but I like to bat the ball around so I keep getting out there and playing.
Taylor at Household Management 101s last blog post..Mar 15, How To Clean Things Around The House
March 16th, 2009
Hi Sara,
I love the message of this post because it is so true. I think sometimes we all get caught up in achieving the perfect end result, we forget to have fun.
Plus no one does anything perfectly the first time. I mean…did Tiger Woods hit a hole in one the first time he tried golf? I don’t think so.
As for mistakes, a mistake is a bad thing only if you don’t learn from it!
So yay for fun! Woo Hoo!
Nadia-Happy Lotuss last blog post..The Power of Peace
March 16th, 2009
I love this idea because so many times we try to turn our hobbies into work to be productive and we lose why we loved them so much in the first place. You’re right on!
Rebeccas last blog post..Spring Cleaning Giveaway – iPod Shuffle!
March 16th, 2009
Sara,
You’ve described the exact right attitude about hobbies.
I know I’m on the right path with a new activity or hobby when I become lost in the activity. By “lost”, I mean that I lose track of time, become very focused on the task, and am unaware of other things around me. I’m totally immersed.
In psychology, this experience is called “flow”:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flow_(psychology)
Roger – A Content Lifes last blog post..30 Days of Mindful Eating – Day 14
March 16th, 2009
I love this post! And I also love fake crab! Judging by the compliments I receive on recipes containing it, either people don’t mind or they don’t notice. I often remind myself that done is better than perfect. It helps me to relax and enjoy what I’m doing, whether hobbies or chores. I’ve lost the joy in more than one hobby over the years for a lack of low expectations.
March 16th, 2009
I don’t know about purposly going for mediocaty…but I know I work best when I let go of expectation. I scrapbook, and if I try to make it something like those in the magazines…then I get frustrated. But when I let it flow…something sparks in me and more often than not, I love the outcome. I will admit, there are times I put them aside to redo.
I was 6 years behind in my scrapbooking…3 vacations since 2004 that I haven’t gotten to…So I decided to let go of the idea of a “perfect” scrapbook, and did one of those books from the picture sites…I love it. Finally it’s done and out where we can share the memories…Sooo, I decided to do the other two vactions the same way. That frees my mind and scrap space, to work on the kids scout books…What a relief!
March 16th, 2009
This is another case for trying to point the car in the right direction and then just driving. Enjoy the trip!
Jarrod – Warrior Developments last blog post..Put Value to Your Actions – Discover Time
March 16th, 2009
God what a good post.
I am over it also with 24/7/365 production.
We made a new rule in our house that says “Absolutely no one is allowed near or on a computer on Sundays”.
Sounds almost primative but it has enhanced our family and hobby life tremendously. I actually just sat down on Sunday and thought through how to rearrange furniture and what furniture we need in our bedroom. It was fun and relaxing to think about us for a change.
Good post and one I enjoyed without rushing through.
Scotts last blog post..AIG Giving Away $165 Million in Bonuses with Taxpayer Money
March 16th, 2009
@Scott: oooh, I need to do that!
March 16th, 2009
What a fabulous and thought-provoking post. I have toyed with taking up photography for years but have been stymied by all the plans I try to put in place around taking classes and buying the right supplies. Maybe I should just start taking pictures and go from there?
March 16th, 2009
Can I send this to my boss?
Christophers last blog post.."Into the Mystic" by Van Morrison
March 16th, 2009
Fun as a goal – cool idea! I’m thinking about how I can try it. I hadn’t thought about the fact that my hobbies involve “results”!
I enjoy gardening, crocheting, walking… I’m not totally perfectionist about it, but I am looking for results & a sense of accomplishment – as opposed to just having fun.
Funny, but when I read the title I though about an old hobby I’ve been considering reclaiming – dog training with my new puppy. But bad news… it is not only result-oriented, but also becomes a competitive activity! It’s still fun, but not in the way intended here.
I need to do some thinking about this…
March 16th, 2009
Just praised On Simplicity on Twitter at http://twitter.com/Acerebel. This site and its world view have been a boon and a blessing to me. I am more contented now, at 51, than ever before and that’s due in no small measure to lessons learned here, thought patterns altered by reading on this site. This latest posting is no different – let’s hear it for ‘art for art’s sake’!
March 17th, 2009
This reminds me of the scene in the kids’ movie Meet the Robinsons when the main character, a 12-year-old boy, messes up an invention and sprays everyone with PB & J as a result. He winces, but they all praise him! I don’t know the exact quote (I was watching it in Chinese), but one woman says something along the lines of: “You learn so much from your failures. When you get it right? Not so much.” It encouraged him to get back to inventing, which he had started to give up because he ‘wasn’t any good at it.’
What I’m wondering is, when is it time to actually give up a hobby? One that’s no longer enjoyable (but maybe because you don’t feel good at it)? Just thinking…
Lori Anns last blog post..List Ingredients
March 17th, 2009
Lori Ann brings up a good question: when is it time to give up a hobby? I’m not sure this works for all hobbies and folks, but my attention span is pretty cyclical. I’ll get sucked into one hobby and focus on it for weeks to months, then my attention is drawn to something new. For the most part, I tend to return to hobbies eventually, and again throw myself into them for a period. If I never come back to it, I guess I’ve quit…
Any other thoughts on when (or how) to pull the plug?
March 17th, 2009
A great book on this topic, especially for Shanel and Regina, is “The Rock Warrior’s Way” by Arno Ilgner. It’s marketed as mental training for rock climbing, but is really about the psychology of risk taking. We gain more when we approach the risk with an attitude of learning, and deciding what we bring to the situation, than when we approach a new task with fear.
If you fall, you fall. If you learn something and enjoy yourself, then the falling is growth.
March 21st, 2009
I just started a philosophy of procrastinating deliberately. aka, setting aside time for procrastinating. it’s great because i don’t feel guilty about it afterwards, which improves my productivity and decreases the amount of time i spend procrastinating while working! it definitely changed my whole attitude to studying!
Crystals last blog post..All I wanted was a ‘thank you’
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