The Simple Guide to Staying Out of Office Politics
Have you ever had a coworker spin your half of a neutral conversation into a tirade against your management team and then report it to them? Ever had someone encourage you to push out a great worker while they were on bereavement leave? I have. And as you can imagine, it was ugly with a capital U. So it’s with nasty experience and a survivor’s instinct that I offer a guide to one of the most dramatic ways to simplify your life: staying out of office politics.
Some may argue that office politics are inevitable. I don’t completely disagree. But I do feel that you can limit your role in these games and minimize their influence on your performance and position by being proactive. Take it from a person who weathered the storms mentioned above and came out on the other side with strong relations intact.
Your office is not a game of Survivor. Skip the alliances.
Even though The Office made light of alliances, some folks still think they need a “team” to defend themselves. Here’s the truth: your best shot at job security is performing your job tasks to the best of your abilities. Win friends by helping them when they need it, sharing credit when it’s due, and being a generally nice person. Creating a clique may bring you closer to a select few, but it also alienates you from others. Of course, this rules goes by the assumption that alienating people is bad, and having as large a network as possible is good. Deal with it.
Identify office gossips and steer clear.
(You can usually identify them by the way they whisper with other workers while looking furtively around. Seriously. Most gossips aren’t that smooth. They want people to know they’ve got information.) But gossip is so, so juicy, right? Too bad. It’s not worth the effort that goes along with it. Office gossips will eventually try to suck you into the imaginary world of power plays and inter-office drama. Half of it doesn’t concern you, and the other half doesn’t even matter. By being seen chatting in hushed tones with an office gossip, you put your credibility in jeopardy. Besides, if you really just love gossip, know that appearing neutral can get you some of the juiciest information. You just have to be sure to never pass it on. Let me repeat: never pass along gossip.
**For telecommuters: Same rules apply. Office gossips are the ones who IM you at strange times and ask oddly off-topic questions or for advice on something they know cold. Sometimes it’s completely innocuous, but when your gut tells you that someone is messaging oddly, be on your best behavior and end the conversation as quickly as possible, since every text conversation can be documented.
Keep to neutral subjects in the workplace.
Sticking to work-related topics is a fantastic way to stay out of office politics. Sure, it’s not as exciting as gushing about your salacious weekend or your neighbor’s annoying habit, but you’ll never have to worry about that information being used against you. Consider it a peace of mind policy. Again, use your gut. Having true friends at the office can be wonderful, but be aware that when you share personal information with a coworker, you’re trusting your job to them. Make sure they deserve that trust.
Keep your ears open for leading questions.
If you get the sense that someone is looking for a specific answer on a personnel issue, find a way to get out of the question. When a coworker has an agenda, even sympathetically shrugging your shoulders can get taken as an enthusiastic “yes” response to a question you didn’t even realize you were asked. When conversations turn to inter-office politics, get out before someone can misinterpret your words to fit their cause.
Spend your time earning trust.
While some people spend their time playing an imaginary game of office chess, you can be actively earning the trust of key players around you. You don’t have to be a toady or a teacher’s pet, you just have to be helpful, sincere, and have great follow-through. While information may be power, your reputation trumps that kind of power easily.
Learn to change the subject, even abruptly if necessary.
Oh, no! Allen from Accounting just asked if you think Maggie was right to report Kristen’s long lunch! Unless you are the person to whom this should be reported, you’re in the danger zone! Quick, defuse the situation or change the subject! “I’m not really the one who decides that,” lets Allen know that you’re not into gossiping. If it continues, be abrupt. “Did you see the new display in the hall? James did a knockout job.” How about, “Speaking of lunch, I had the best roast beef sandwich.” It doesn’t matter if it’s rough and obvious. It’s still a better option than taking sides in an unrelated work battle.
Find a third party to talk to about work issues.
Just because you can’t dish the dirt on the job, that doesn’t mean you can air your grievances with an outside party. Save the grumbling and groaning for your roommate, your spouse, your friend, your mom… anyone who’s not related to your workplace. It can also help to preface any trash talking with, “I’m just letting off steam here.” If you do need advice, ask for it specifically.
Don’t do anything to be the subject of gossip if you can help it.
This may be the most critical tactic of all. It’s easier to stay out of the gossip game if your name isn’t part of the drama. You don’t have to lay low, you just need to make sure that you’re only getting attention when you want it, for good reasons. In other words, don’t dish about your wedding, vent about your annoying roommate, or secretly accuse someone of stealing your “moistmaker” sandwich. Stick to your job duties, and do them well. Play nice with others and build your reputation as a team player, and it’ll be hard for any sharks to see you as chum.
Note: I’m sure there a lot of folks who will disagree with some of the general premise here. Since you spend 33 percent of your life at work, you should be having fun and making friends, right? That’s fine with me. I don’t have as many years in the workforce as many other people, but so far, my neutrality has helped me be friends with a lot of great people without having it affect my work life in a negative way.
I’ve actually had managers hear about negative comments I’ve been reported to make and say, “That doesn’t sound like Sara. I’m going to check with her first before jumping to conclusions.” The larger issue for me is credibility, and I’m happy to keep my work and personal lives a bit separate if I can maintain that.
What about you? Is it possible to stay out of office politics? What tactics have you used?






This post has 18 comments
November 24th, 2008
Sara,
Thank you for the tips. They will come in handy! What I did is mostly like you. However, I did not stay out of it. Instead, I stand in the middle and be neutral. What you suggested is powerful; “earn trust”. I tried to be as honest as possible. I talk straight and never change my words.
I think the surest way to be gossiped is to gossip. People rarely trust people who regularly gossip.
I also do not mind being gossiped as long as I’m honest to everyone I encounter. I believe that someone will spread good words about me, hopefully. If not, then, let it be. What I did might sound arrogant but it’s the way to keep me sane. Trying to figure out everything other people are talking about you is self-destructive.
Like you wrote, I do two things; be honest and earn trust.
Great article!
Viriyas last blog post..Summary: Your Career Choice
November 24th, 2008
Hi Sara - You are so right and so smart to stay out of the morass. Office politicos will turn and eat you, even if you are allied, at the drop of a hat if they perceive it advantageous to do so. Or how about when you all agree “something must be done!” and you speak up expecting support and they leave you twisting in the wind? Nope. You’re right to stay out of things. This is the ugly side of group dynamics, and part of the reason I’m an entrepreneur. Great post!
November 24th, 2008
I’m lucky to no longer be in an office environment. But when I was, I tried to abide by a simple rule which kept me out of the muck. Basically, I believe that if someone speaks badly about another person to me, behind their back, then the speaker will almost certainly be doing the same to me when I am not around. So the first part of the rule is to watch out for those people…
The second part of the same rule is to make sure that I don’t say anything about anyone that I would not say if they were there in the room with me. First off, that keeps my conscience clear. Second, I’m convinced that on some level my co-workers must have noticed that I never bad-mouthed others. And I think that builds trust and confidence. If someone knows that you are not going to turn around and stab them in the back when they are not there, they are probably going to be a lot more trusting of you.
It is easy to get sucked into the “bring someone else down to bring yourself up” game. But my simple rule usually kept me out of trouble.
Cheers,
Adam
Adam Steers last blog post..What are those Clubbell® Things?
November 24th, 2008
Great advice. Sometimes coworkers will go to great lengths to try and drag you into their little intrigues. It’s important to be prepared.
Vered - MomGrinds last blog post..Desperate Fifties Housewives
November 24th, 2008
Provide value to those around you and they will stand up for you.
Marc and Angel Hack Lifes last blog post..Your Life’s Story Told in One Sentence
November 24th, 2008
Hi Sara. Avoiding office politics was a challenge in my working days. It’s hard to avoid it. People like to talk about people. I was pretty good at keeping out of that circle though because I didn’t volunteer too much information about myself.
Davinas last blog post..Small Steps To Empower Your Attitude
November 24th, 2008
Hate office politics worse than almost anything. I’ve been burned far too many times by political operators. Fortunately, I’m in a field where competence is prized, and political operators without the requesite skills get found out quickly.
Working in IT, the biggest things I have to ward off office politics are:
1. Skill and expertise. “I’d like to chat, but the CEO needs me to fix his email now.” Concentrating on the job at hand is a great way to avoid most political stuff.
2. Federal regulations. Sarbanes-Oxley and HIPPA are great ways to ward off most political discussions. Just point to the prosecutions of those who gossiped about Enron at Arthur Andersen (now Accenture, they couldn’t keep their good name after some of the political operators were indicted). National security rules are pretty draconian, and would invite visits from the FBI, Homeland Security ATF, and other heavily armed Federal agencies. A reminder of this to the gossipers and political operators tends to chill a lot of stuff.
In the end, as an Asperger, I just don’t have the requesite abilities to be a political operator, and while I’ve been burned several times, there has always been a large heaping dose of schadenfreude at the end for me to laugh about.
November 25th, 2008
Unfortunately I tend to be a loner at work so I rarely get caught up in anything besides wondering who threw the plastic bottle into the trash. Whenever I hear whispering or complaining, I walk the other way. I don’t want to give anyone any reason to get rid of me, those its a moot point here in California (at-will employment).
Carlas last blog post..Whats for dinner? | My semi green Thanksgiving
November 25th, 2008
I wish this one was so simple. Humans are complex people.
Since they build social networks and group in tribes it can a challenge to not belong. Office departments tend to look out for themselves. It’s all weird and wacky.
Squawkfoxs last blog post..Snow, Rain, and Slush Oh My!
November 25th, 2008
Wow, that’s something I can relate to. My office is an amalgamation of multiple divisions/companies that have been bought out by one big company. Mostly I just try to be polite to everyone and steer clear of any negative talk, it’s hard though. But just being a trustworthy and hardworking person takes you far. I definitely agree with Adam’s point that if someone is talking about a co-worker behind their back, you can bet money that they would talk about you behind yours if you give them anything to talk about.
November 25th, 2008
Great article. The best advice is simply to avoid gossip at all costs (this helps with family communications as well, by the way). Keeping personal emotions out of the mix is a good idea, if you can help it. Another good tip is to live by the phrase, “if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.
Ians last blog post..Talking and Squawking
November 25th, 2008
These would work not just in the office but in life in general (family, church, club, neighborhood politics).
I’m so glad I work from home and don’t have to deal with politics. I have a friend that has to deal with enough for the both of us. I’m her 3rd party. I can’t believe what goes on in her office.
Susys last blog post..On the Preservation Front: In the Freezer
November 25th, 2008
Viriya: You know, I also don’t mind being gossiped about, as long as I know I haven’t done anything that might damage my credibility. If the choice is between getting embroiled and letting it go to focus on meaningful work and relationship building, I’m like you–I’d rather let it go.
Betsy: Congrats on going your own way! I think that it would quite fun to gossip about myself if I were the only one involved.
Adam: You’re 100 percent correct. Hearing the juice about someone else nearly always comes with a price. Keeping the conscience clear is a fantastic way to stay above it all. Sounds like your common sense and confidence have served you well!
Vered: It has always amazed me when the ugly truth comes out. It’s like, “They did what? In what universe is that even an option?” There are much better ways to spend one’s time.
Marc and Angel: Bingo!
Davina: I also try to keep my personal information out of it. I’m actually quite cynical about it. I feel that everything I share can and will be used against me at some point, so it had better be worth more than just killing a few minutes.
jrandom42: I completely agree with you that skill at your actual job will nearly always trump skill in political maneuvering. Your legal solution is also quite elegant!
Carla: I feel you. Sometimes it’s lonely to not be in the loop, but the stress is never worth the momentary rush of being “in” on the dirt. Walking the other way sends a clear and positive message about your focus.
Squawkfox: I can’t disagree. It’s not always so simple. I guess I’ve just been lucky enough to be stuck in departments that have been able to stay out of things. Which is good, because like jrandom42, I have no skill for personal politics!
V. Higgins: Adam really nailed the core of the issue, right? We can participate and risk getting burned, or we can put our money on our skills. They’re both risky, but one helps you sleep better at night.
Ian: Good point–this goes beyond the office. Mama’s old adage still works!
Susy: 100 percent agreed. It’s harder to stay out of with family and friends, but in the end, it’s all still just gossip. I’m glad your friend has someone to help keep the drama in perspective.
November 25th, 2008
Stellar ideas. I’ll tuck this away should I ever be back in a work situation. I like the staying away from the gossips one.
And I agree with Susy, good life plans to follow in general.
Jannies last blog post..Why do you blog?
November 26th, 2008
Example of using the Feds to avoid office politics:
“I’d like to comment, but HIPPA regulations tell me I can’t.”
“I could tell you, but I’d have to report this to the FBI, and you’re likely to get a visit from them and Homeland Security.”
“Do you realize that someone at Arthur Anderson got federally indicted for talking about the same stuff?”
November 28th, 2008
Great tips! I really need these since I start my first full time job in January!
Girl on Tops last blog post..The Day After
November 28th, 2008
“Find a third party to talk to about work issues.” I suggest that the third party should NOT be your blog readers. (That’s one of my hard-and-fast rules about blogging: (1) No discussion of work; (2) No discussion of intimate details of my marriage.)
Great advice here!
December 2nd, 2008
Hey Sara!
Great site, just found you through SU.
I like what you write about earning trust.
Trust has a lot of meaning to me, especially trusting in life itself…
See you around!
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