Feeling Rich in a Broke Economy
You may have heard the story of Diderot’s robe somewhere along the way. You know: Diderot receives a fabulously luxurious robe, then bit by bit, ends up upgrading every aspect of his life so that everything matches the quality of the new robe. By the end, he misses his old careworn, well-loved robe, as well as everything that went along with it.
Here’s the thing: I think I just bought my husband Diderot’s robe, quite literally. With a few leftover wedding gift cards to use up (who knows what store’s going bankrupt next?), B and I hit the mall and picked up some nice rocks glasses, a pair of hefeweizen glasses, and a fuzzy robe for my husband. He’s been on a kick about enjoying the everyday aspects of life, and the occasional bath has become one of those things. The man has never had a robe in his life, and it was the most exciting thing we found in the store. Warm and incredibly soft, it seemed like the perfect splurge for a guilt-free gift card binge.
Feeling good about our purchases, B and I headed home, wondering if this was how most Americans spent their weekends. We’re not used to just going shopping for the hell of it, so you imagine the Christmas Day glee we carried our lovely new bags into the house with.
Diderot’s Got Nothing on Us
Fast-forward about 15 minutes, and my husband puts on the new robe over his clothes and starts preening as a joke. He cups his chin between his forefinger and thumb and look haughtily toward the distance. Here’s the funny part: he suddenly looks like a rich man. We start laughing as plays the part to a T. We pull out the new rocks glasses, pour in a bit of scotch, and when I stop giggling to look up at B, I catch my breath. My husband, he of the declasse jokes and Bud Light, looks as if he’s to the manor born. It’s an amazing transformation. I have him look in the mirror to see if I’m imagining it. He concurs: he looks like a rich prick. And to be honest, he’s kind of enjoying it.
What am I getting at here? That my husband’s a prick? (Don’t worry, he’s not.) That the right bathrobe can turn you into Warren Buffett? (Sadly, not so much.) That we found happiness through shopping? (If that were true, you probably would have seen the 404 “This page can no longer be found” message here today.)
What I’m really getting at is the idea of wealth and happiness. It can feel good to feel wealthy, especially in hard times, and it can be surprisingly small things that get you there. By taking a good look at some of your favorite activities and finding ways to indulge in them a bit more, you can tap into that peace of mind a little more often. You don’t have to have a million in the bank to feel like you’ve made it. Sometimes all it takes is a fuzzy bathrobe, a good Scotch, and someone to make you laugh.
Let me know: agree or disagree? Is there a value in feeling wealthy from time to time, or does it just make you want to upgrade other parts of your life? And what things make you feel wealthy (assuming you don’t have a swimming pool filled with gold bullion)? Drop into the comments and share your story!
photo credit: Morgan Sutherland
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This post has 25 comments
November 3rd, 2008
Quite an interesting post. I must say that this notion has crossed my mind before. I know that i have more (material possessions) than many other people in this world, even though in today’s society i am probably regarded as lower middle class. The saying that money cant buy happiness is absolutely true, although i think there are times i would rather be sad in a mansion than sad on the streets! I could always drown my sorrows in the jacuzzi, or switch on the TV.
in my opinion, it all comes down to being grateful for what you have in this world. Theres always someone worse off than you, no matter how hard the times might seem. so, even just having the pleasure of flowers in your garden, can make you feel wealthy. And how can there not be any value in that? There are those without houses, much less a garden.
things that make me feel wealthy:
1. having my own car
2. having a decent job and salary
3. gifts
4. my stack of books thats filling up my room
November 3rd, 2008
OMG Sara, this post totally hits home right now. My husband needed – desperately – a new winter coat. (We are in Canada, where it is cold for 6 months). The first choice didn’t work for him – it had buttons, which he didn’t like. So we took that back, and found a black leather jacket, which was about $90 more. A bit pricey as a purchase, but he liked it, and he will wear it for years. Well the first time I saw him come home with that jacket on, he looked like a millionaire! Very stylish and very handsome. Clothes might not make the man, but a splurge now and then can never hurt.
November 3rd, 2008
Excellent post, Sara. Ya know, there are two items that have changed the course of my life dramatically. And without a bit of wealth, I would have never obtained them. Those things are my musical instruments (drums and guitar) and my computer (with internet). Having the ability to create music for years and then record it on my computer and share it online… one of the best abilities in the world!
Without the help I received from my parents on these items, I don’t know where I would be right now. They altered the path of my life dramatically. And let me tell you… I am so thankful for that wealth. Don’t know if that is what you meant with that post, but that is my piece
- Jack Rugile
Simple Sapien
Simple Sapiens last blog post..What’s Your Best Effort?
November 3rd, 2008
Life without a few pleasures can be rather dreary.
I had an aunt who lived like a pauper, even though she had the money to live comfortably. She would never do anything nice for herself. When she died, all the money went to nieces and nephews. Would gladly have given up my share if she would have enjoyed her life a little. Stuff may not buy happiness. But denying yourself may not bring it either.
Anyway, back on topic. If you can afford it, and it gives you pleasure, I don’t see anything wrong with the occasional splurge.
November 3rd, 2008
I feel wealthy going out for an expensive dinner. Reminds me of a time a couple of years ago – after many hours on a big project at work, and at the successful completion of that project – the company I was with sent my wife and I out for an all expenses paid dinner. We ended up at a very classy steakhouse downtown – had that finest steaks and shrimp, the best martinis, and a rich dessert. We dressed up (and that doesn’t happen every day…), caught a show at the local performing arts center, and just had a very upscale evening. And this all felt good. Even though it wasn’t going to become a regular occurrence – feeling “rich” for an evening was an indulgence that was so worth it.
Our swimming pool holds city water…and blows up…but, hey, what’s water and a blow up toy to one is gold to another (our kids). It’s all a matter of perspective!!
Lances last blog post..Guest Post: What’s Your Best Effort?
November 3rd, 2008
I keep telling my husband how rich we are He disagrees, thinking only in terms of money. For me it’s being able to live the life we love. We’ve consistently lived beneath our means, but we haven’t deprived ourselves.
Jean Browman–Cheerful Monks last blog post..What I Learned From Plato’s Republic
November 3rd, 2008
Staying at a nice hotel always makes me feel rich and being able to fill my fridge with delicious, healthy food makes me feel rich too. I’m working on inner peace and strength because I just know that those will make me not only rich but unstoppable. Great post!
Tiffanys last blog post..My Mother’s Gift
November 3rd, 2008
I absolutely agree with this post. I spend money on nice candles, french milled soaps and high thread count sheets. Now having said that. I use them to make me feel pampered. I usually cut out other things to make up for it. But have found that nice things make me feel special, with 7 kids I need special!
November 4th, 2008
Hello Sara. I made some yummy chocolate brownies this weekend. After dinner I iced one with chocolate icing and had a couple of ounces of cointreau. Priceless!
In fact, (excuse me), I think it’s time for a repeat performance
Davinas last blog post..A Ghostly Life Experience
November 4th, 2008
I definitely feel rich, despite being stuck in some investments. I do not even bother to track them much as I know that in time, there will be a turnaround. I don’t find it necessary to cut back all that much from my previous spending, because I have always been rather prudent.
Evelyn Lims last blog post..My Out-of-Body Experiences
November 4th, 2008
When I was poor earlier in my life, I always wanted to be “rich” enough to afford to buy shrimp whenever I wanted. Now that I CAN afford them, I don’t want them. But just knowing I can, makes me feel wealthy! It’s all those intangible things that make me rich – my friends, my health, my goofy greyhound. My job funds all those things, but those are the things that make me feel rich – oh, and one really good bottle of wine every now and then!
November 4th, 2008
Being able to afford to live on my own in a great (if slightly shabby) flat in one of the most beautiful parts of my city makes me feel wealthy and very, very lucky, even after four years there. It also happens to be one of the city’s wealthiest suburbs, but I usually feel a little embarrassed when I tell people where I live. Thankfully I don’t feel any pressure to upgrade the rest of my life to match my posh postcode!
Having plenty of spare time to lie about on my couch, being able to pay my bills on time and donate money regularly to charity also make me feel rich.
The relationship between buying stuff and happiness is very interesting. I have made some purchases recently which have given me great pleasure, but I think the pleasure from my cool new sneakers will be much more temporary than the joy I get from my flash new camera because the camera is more valuable to me for what it enables me to do – derive more pleasure from a hobby. As cool and bouncy as my new sneakers are, eventually they will lose their “newness” ad novelty.
November 4th, 2008
Your post makes mes think that perhaps that is why people want to buy “art”, since I am an artist.
I liked also, reading some of the comments from your readers and agree with David Y. Our life is all we’ve got -while blowing money and being too material isn’t the answer to happiness, “feeling wealthy” by adding things that bring pleasure to your life (and it doesn’t have to be things we buy – it could be sharing time with spouse, friends, pets, writing music, painting, etc) is as Martha would say – a good thing.
Judy
Judy Mackeys last blog post..Escape – A Painting of Irises
November 4th, 2008
Don’t keep up with the Joneses- be the Joneses. After living in an expensive neighborhood, my newly divorced daughter and two children moved to an undesirable area. The area has the highest rate of crime and poverty in the county. This worked out great. Crime is high because it is friend/family on friend/family, very little or no stranger crime, so she is perfectly safe. Both of my grandchildren are in the honors classes and one is in the gifted class. My granddaughter wanted to be a cheerleader and since she had no talent but meet the grade requirement, she was picked. The can play any sport, activity etc – in other words they get to be the cream of the crop, they stand out. If they lived in the “nice” neighborhood, the competition would have been fierce and they would never have the opportunity to shine. My daughter bought a beautiful Victorian 4 floor home for a third of the cost in the nice neighborhood. There are many other opportunities available because it is a low income area- the after school day care which was staffed by college students was only $8.00 a week. My granddaughter who is quite the diva has close friends of all ethnicity, black, hispanic and mixed. They tolerate her diva attitude better than her white friends and her best friend since kindergarten is bi-racial.
I also moved to this area and found other lower middle class people who are able to live a nicer middle class life because of the economic opportunities available- cheaper utilities, subsidized activities etc.
November 4th, 2008
I completely agree. A colleague and I are actually working together on a project about a very similar topic. I think luxury and feeling rich is more a state of mind than anything else.
November 4th, 2008
Sorry to write again but I agree with Jean!
Judy
Judy Mackeys last blog post..Escape – A Painting of Irises
November 4th, 2008
If you live a life of abundance, you can live a life of true joy. This has got nothing to do with riches. If you believe that you have enough and more, your life will reflect that attitude. This has been my experience. I am yet to touch rock bottom, as before I can, something happens and the resources appear as if someone is deliberately looking to give them to me at the appropriate time.
November 4th, 2008
Oh man, I honestly think a large part of that feeling is being aware of those little things. I’ve been saving up my weekly ‘fun money’ to buy certain things I like, and it’s so fun when the package arrives and I get to try a new product (lately I’ve been addicted to Sephora). But being able to look at the beautiful hills with the clouds rolling over them in the morning sunlight while I drive my car (that’s reliable and has working heat) to my job that isn’t going anywhere… I feel so rich, so blessed. Spending a Sunday afternoon cuddled and warm as the rain falls outside… There are so many of those moments in life that make you stop and just be. I love those moments.
November 4th, 2008
I am new to your blog. What a great post and great responses. I have been thinking alot about luxury and what it means in my life lately. My latest newsletter for my money coaching business is on this exact topic! Thanks for putting it out there. We all can feel luxurious with a little creativity.
kbk
November 4th, 2008
I was really curious as to what the response would be on this post! After all, even I didn’t quite know what to make of the experience…
I’m getting a feeling that most folks enjoy getting to feel wealthy, but that the definition of wealth and the means of getting there really vary from person to person. I would definitely agree that it’s not always materials goods that make me feel rich. Sometimes it’s being able to stay in bed and enjoy the warmth for an extra half hour.
I also like what Jean mentioned: once you can have something, it’s not so important that you actually do get it. Maybe it’s really just the breathing room of being able to make choices (occasionally indulgent choices) that really underscores the feeling of wealth?
November 4th, 2008
Yes, I agree and I am a really cheap date. All it takes to make me feel wealthy in these bad economic times is a few Budweisers, a camp fire, and a beautiful fall night.
Dave Jones, CPAs last blog post..I Pledge Allegiance….
November 4th, 2008
A square of expensive chocolate savored makes me feel rich.
Plus just looking around my small house. We have more electronics, books, computers, than we did growing up. We have things that weren’t even thought of when we were kids.
But most importantly the love and support of family and friends.
November 5th, 2008
I do enjoy the “finer” things in life but work at keeping it in prospective. Though we worked hard for what we have, most people in the world don’t have the privilege or opportunity to do so. 40+ years ago, the same opportunities weren’t available for my parents, grandparents and beyond.
Though we are not rich or even well-off, living where we live; in an area where there is a lot of natural beauty with the convenience of living on the heels of an urban area makes me feel rich. The occasional trip to a boutique or online store doesn’t hurt either, but that doesn’t make or break how I feel. It can be Saks a thrift store, or yard sale and I still feel “rich”.
Carlas last blog post..Cautious or paranoid? Finding balance with green living
November 9th, 2008
We go out to lunch at nice places when we need a little shot in the arm. Same luxury, lower price. Fun with less guilt.
Janes last blog post..Fall Freedom
November 10th, 2008
I like Carla’s idea of being opportunity rich. Even in rough times, we still have a wealth of opportunities to choose from. Add in the little things like chocolate and the big things like family, and it’s hard to feel like we’re doing okay.
Of course, being a cheap date doesn’t hurt, right?
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