My husband has been laid up for about a month now. It hasn’t been easy, but it also hasn’t been that hard, even with a recent out-of-town conference thrown in. I have picked up some new tricks along the way. And come to find out, I have a lot of fun planning out meals so that we eat new and different things. (The garlic salmon? Good! The crab won-tons? Not so much.) We’re about halfway through with this little experiment, which is just a euphemism for “Sara does all the work,” and here’s the main things I’ve taken away so far.

Having a range of basic skills makes your life easier. I needed to wear far more hats than usual over the past few weeks. It became very clear that by avoiding some tasks, I’d only made life harder for myself. Taking the time to learn basic skills like cooking, tracking finances, lawn care, and auto maintenance makes your life easier and are all well worth the investment of time to learn.

Going on the “To Do” List: Learn how to change a sprinkler head.

Family and friends are worth their weight in gold. Freshly prepared beef stew delivered to your door? No one but family or a really good friend is going to do that for free. Because we’re fortunate enough to have good family relations, we had a built-in support network. From hot baked cinnamon rolls and the occasional lawn mowing to having friends to call at all hours of the day, it was a joy to remember that there are people in the world you can count on. Maintaining these relationships is a great way to help everyone, including yourself, make life simple during challenging times.

Going on the “To Do” List: Add in birthday reminders to the calendar and send out cards or make a phone call.

Plan ahead to be nice. We talked ahead of time about how easy it would be to get crabby with each other. After all, I’m frustrated to be doing all the work and he’s frustrated because, well, he can’t frickin’ walk. We talked ahead of time about how important it would be to treat each other nicely. We also talked about how we’re probably going to screw it up every once in a while. (I’m telling you, he’s trouble when he doesn’t have anybody else to zing all day!) So far, so good. By talking about our concerns and mapping the probable pitfalls ahead of time, we’ve been able to get frustrated and annoyed without taking it out on each other. At this point, it’s been pretty much a non-issue as a result.

Going on the “To Do” List: Make a list of nice things I can preemptively do for B the next time he’s stressed out.

Confidence and guts can make life simpler. I could whimper and whine about all the slack I’m having to pick up, but in the end, it would all just take longer. Things are going smoothest when I just step up to the plate and handle the issue, even if it makes me uncomfortable. As it’s played out, a certain amount of confidence comes from knowing that I can’t possibly screw things up half as badly as I imagine I can. Ah, sweet relief…

Going on the “To Do” List: Take on the next new project that comes across my desk, even if it seems like a challenge.

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