Fiddle-dee-dee! The Art of Scarlett O’Hara Optimism
She may be a spoiled, somewhat delusional, sheltered Southern belle, but you’ve got to give it to Scarlett O’Hara: the gal’s a first-class optimist. This is a character who doesn’t just turn lemons in to lemonade, she turns curtains into couture. And while her aim may not always be pure, she never lets a setback (or even a war) stop her from dreaming and reaching her goals.
If you’re a dreamer of any kind, then optimism isn’t just a state of mind, it’s a weapon in your arsenal. Without a healthy amount of optimism, the first setback you come across can cause you to give up. So if you’d like to tap into some of that “tomorrow is another day” optimism, consider the following ways to embrace your inner believer:
1. Ignore convention. The most optimistic act you can commit is one that flies in the face every bit of conventional wisdom you’ve heard. Scarlett didn’t let anyone tell her she couldn’t run a plantation, a business, or well, anything. If you listen to the crowd on every issue, you’ll never have an extraordinary moment. Have the courage to believe that you can challenge the status quo and come out ahead, and watch doors you never even saw before suddenly fly open.
2. Change your mind. The ultimate form of optimism is knowing that there’s a world of possibilities yet to be discovered. In Scarlett O’Hara’s terms, just because you told someone you hated him and hoped you never saw him again, that doesn’t mean he’s not the love of your life. Hopefully, your changes of mind and heart are less dramatic, but above all, reserve your right to change your mind. Changing your mind is not giving up; it’s evolving. It’s recognizing that there may be more different, better options for you. Far from being a pessimistic act of waving the white flag, changing your mind can be the ultimate act of Scarlett-style optimism.
3. Earn the respect of others. Yes, she was manipulative, but in the end Scarlett got what she wanted because she had earned the respect of the people she needed. Whether you earn that respect through being consistent, being great at what you do, or simply because you’re unimaginably ballsy (the Scarlett method), it’s vital. Optimism can get you pretty damn far, farther than you might imagine, but you will need the help of others if you have big goals. Take the time today to start earning the respect of your peers and industry, and you’ll be able to get others to believe in your optimistic vision.
4. Never be afraid to dance. So what if you’re in mourning for the husband you never loved and only married to make your sister’s husband jealous? If you want to dance, then by all means dance. There’s never (well, rarely…) a bad time to embrace the joy in life and follow your passion. When you can view life as full of possibility instead of filled with limitations, guess what? You’re an optimist. Take a cue from Scarlett and dance, laugh, and love, even when the world is quite certain you should be crying.
5. Embrace your special talents. If you’re Scarlett, this means pinching your cheeks for color and batting your eyes to get what you want. If you’ve got good people skills, then it means taking the time to engage as many folks as you can in conversation. Whatever your best talents are, use them as often as possible. It’s always good to stretch yourself, but there’s no reason not to use your natural talents to your advantage. What does this have to do with optimism? By identifying and tapping into your strong points, you can find more opportunities to shine and be confident in yourself as well. If you feel that you can use your talents to your advantage in any situation, you’re a bonafide optimist.
What do you feel are the best ways to be optimistic? Are there limits to how far optimism can take you? Waltz your way into the comments, and let me hear what you have to say.
This post has 21 comments
September 8th, 2008
I enjoyed reading your view of Scarlett as the doyenne of positive thinking, Sara. “Never be afraid to dance” is a good one.
I’m a great believer in the power of positive thinking and having a spirit of optimism. Many things become possible when your mind is open and ready for the potential of good things.
For me, the best way to be optimistic is to always focus on the plus points in any situation.
This is definitely difficult sometimes though. Often, it’s only with hindsight that we can see the traces of the positive.
But usually, I always make a conscious effort to pinpoint something that helps me to have even a touch of optimism.
September 8th, 2008
It seems like we are both into “The Art of” posts today, excellent!
4. Never be afraid to dance - Funnily that’s also a part of my post today, have we been reading each others minds?
Seriously though, great post, I love it when bloggers get the best out of others over the lives that they lived or even the quotes they made
Cheers,
Glen
September 8th, 2008
I believe optimism is the ability to seeing a silver lining. Even when in the throws of what seem like the impossible, you don’t give up and know that there is “another side”. That’s why I loved #4 Never be afraid to dance.
I remain optimistic by using experiences for learning and growth opportunities rather than mistakes and failures. This way of thinking allows me to say “I tried it, it didn’t work, here’s what I learned. Let’s try again.”
It’s not easy if you’re not used to it, but I’m told it can be learned.
September 8th, 2008
I loved this post even though I really didn’t like the Scarlett O’hara character much.
I think it’s really important to not just go with what the world tells you to do. Only the individual knows what’s right for him or her.
September 8th, 2008
Scott: “Many things become possible when your mind is open and ready for the potential of good things.” That’s exactly how I feel. Being cynical may keep you out of trouble, but it also closes off a lot of doors.
Glen: I’m happy to share the wavelength! For readers who are interested, Glen’s post today is The Art of Authenticity.
Stacey: I think it can be learned, too. It just takes practice, and possibly a lucky break or two.
Sharon: If we all did what we supposed to do, can you imagine how boring the world would be?
September 8th, 2008
When my optimism fades, I put my life into perspective. There are so many struggling people in this world that it’s pretty easy for me to remember how fortunate I am. Remembering all of my blessings usually kicks me out of any pessimistic funk.
September 8th, 2008
“When you can view life as full of possibility instead of filled with limitations, guess what? You’re an optimist.”
I love this definition of optimism!
September 8th, 2008
We have the power to choose - and I choose optimism. That doesn’t mean there aren’t days that I say I can’t do “it”, or there’s no way that’s possible.
Maybe we don’t have all the tools we need to do something - try anyway. Maybe we don’t have all the skills we think we need - try anyway. Maybe we think our ideas are off the wall - definitely try anyway.
I guess my mantra to optimism would be “try anyway”.
Life is what we make it to be for us. I want a life of abundance (in love, experiences, connections, sharing, etc). The way to that is through an optimistic belief in ourselves and others.
September 8th, 2008
Stacey: You’re right. Perspective is a beautiful thing, and can get you through some hard times with if not a smile, a smirk.
Vered: Thanks! I certainly don’t think you have to be ridiculously upbeat to be considered optimistic.
Lance: “Try anyway.” I think that’s simply wonderful. Nothing seems like a waste or a loss that way, just another step or experience. And I absolutely love your definition of abundance. I couldn’t agree more!
September 8th, 2008
I loved this!
I always felt like I had a bit too many of Scarlett’s personality traits to hate her like so many others do. And yes, when times get rough, ‘thinking about that tomorrow’ instead of dwelling on it helps get you through!
September 8th, 2008
You know, although in the movie Scarlett O’Hara was played by the spectacularly beautiful Vivian Leigh, the character created by Margaret Mitchell was not beautiful. The book “Gone With the Wind” begins as follows” “Scarlett O’Hara was not beautiful, but men seldom realized this when caught by her charm . . . ” Scarlett was so sure of herself and so full of life that people soon forgot that she was not beautiful.
September 9th, 2008
Beautiful post. I had a very nice feeling with your point #4. Great advice there about dancing, laughing and loving whenever we feel like we want to. Our attitude towards life is what makes us so beautiful!
September 9th, 2008
Wendy: Ah, a Scarlett personality! What a pleasure. Do you think it’s true that the world can be divided up into Scarletts and Melanies? Someone tried to convince me of that once, but I’m not buying it…
Marelisa: Exactly! It’s not that Scarlett was so lucky and graced with something others were not. She made the best of what she had, or in other words, she worked it.
Evelyn: Thanks so much! That point seems to be striking a chord with lots of readers. What would happen if we laughed and smiled every time the world didn’t go our way?
September 9th, 2008
For those of us not blessed with beauty, charm, confidence, and grace, doing the Scarlett O’Hara optimism is a chore at best, and most often downright impossible.
I’ve seen too much, done too much in the underside of life, to be truly optinmistic in this vein, so all I really can do is grind my way through the muck and trust that the effort will be instrumental in making things better.
“Take a cue from Scarlett and dance, laugh, and love, even when the world is quite certain you should be crying.”
Advice to be used very carefully. I’ve seen someone break out laughing at a funeral and almost get beaten to death by outraged relatives.
As for embracing special talents, I have, but it hasn’t led to any kind of optimism, even as I’ve gained confidence in what I can do. Mostly, people look at me like I’m a nonhuman creature, or actively disrepect me for being a “pencil-necked geek loser”, even as I save their lost files and data.
Optimism is a fine quality, but without some grounding in reality, it tends to be delusional.
September 9th, 2008
Jrandom42: I really do think that beauty and charm aren’t necessary to build a solid reputation. Confidence is important, though.
I actually agree with you about grounding optimism in reality. To do otherwise is to expect millions to fall in your lap while watching the Price Is Right from your couch.
Frankly, it pisses me off that that you’d be disrespected for being good at your job. It can be hard for others to admit that they can’t handle something. It’s no excuse for being a jerk, though. Perhaps there’s another set of folks that might be able to appreciate your talents without all the workplace baggage.
And yeah, laughing at a funeral is for advanced optimists only.
I’ve been incredibly inspired at the joy and laughter at some funerals. Depends on the attendees, service, and timing, I guess.
September 9th, 2008
“Never be afraid to dance.” I gotta echo the sentiments of few others and say this is a great way to show optimism. It’s pretty hard to dance and cry at the same time!
September 10th, 2008
Al: Yeah, now that you mention it, I don’t think I’ve ever danced and cried at the same time. I came pretty close at my wedding (dancing with Dad), but managed to smile instead.
September 10th, 2008
For some reason, those of us who are technically inclined and are comfortable dealing with various bits of technology, as well as the hard sciences of mathematics, physics, chemistry and their engineering offshoots, are seen as being weird, strange, and not quite human. Most of our interests are not typically mainstream, and neither is our outlook. Our sense of humor more often than not is based on our intelligence and the observations of the ridiculiousness of daily life (Monty Python is a periennal fav). Again, we may not get respected, but there is a great deal of shadenfreude when the person who has been denigrating us has to grugingly say “thank you for revcovering my data”, as they sign the check.
As for the funeral incident, it was what you would call a one-off incident with all sorts of special circumstances. Email me if you want the particulars.
September 10th, 2008
jrandom42: The first Monty Python mention on the blog! Woo-hoo! I would quibble with you, though, on the idea that senses of humor are based on intelligence. Academic, sure, but I know too many sophomoric engineers to buy into any kind of stereotype.
Thanks for continuing the conversation–and enjoy the schadenfreude (and the checks!).
September 13th, 2008
Good article. I like optimism and ability to defy conventions
September 14th, 2008
Tejvan: Thanks so much!
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