Psyche Yourself Out: Creating Relaxing Rituals

It can be hard to transition from your busy work day to relaxing at home. With your body geared up and your mind worn out, no wonder people choose television as a way to unwind and relax at the end of the work day. There’s a better way to relax, though—one that leaves you in control of how you choose to spend the rest of your energy. Create a relaxing ritual!

Pavlov proved that animals could be conditioned, meaning that an external stimulus could create physical responses. So, if a dog can start drooling in expectation of food just from hearing a bell, it’s not unrealistic to think that we might be able to make ourselves relax by changing our surroundings.

Here’s just one example of how many people already use conditioning to help themselves transition between roles or situations: It’s Friday and you’ve been watching the clock for the last hour. Conversations from the previous eight hours jockey for position in your mind. You drive home and still feel wired. Once at home, you reach for a cold, frosty beer. As you pour the drink, you feel ready to let the week go and focus on the weekend ahead. Before a sip crosses your lips, you’ve put yourself in a mindset to relax. That’s what a ritual can do for you.

The Benefits of Relaxing

I’m sure there’s a lot of folks who have too much to do to worry about relaxing once they get home. There’s dinner to be cooked, children to tend to, overeager pets to play with, laundry to hang, and… and, well, the list never ends. So why sacrifice your limited time for what may seem like a selfish reason? Because if you’re relaxed, you’ll be able to do everything better.

If you give yourself a few minutes to transition from work, you’ll often get an energy boost. Your attitude can improve, making it easier and more pleasant to take care of “to do” items. Patience is restored. Your family and loved ones can benefit from a friendlier you–the best version of you, not the post-work leftovers. Plus, it only takes five to fifteen minutes for a ritual. That’s enough time to make room for in any schedule.

Good Relaxation Rituals Should:

• Provide a contrast with work, duties, and responsibilities
• Be relatively fast and easy
• Be focused on enjoyment
• Should not add any information to your day

A ritual doesn’t need to be complex or extravagant. All it needs to be is something you do each day to gear down. My own ritual is to grab a glass of something yummy; most of the time it’s iced tea, on other occasions, it’s wine. Either way, I pour it in a wine glass. It’s kind of silly, but drinking from a wine glass helps me to realize that I’m not at work in a very obvious and kinesthetic kind of way. Holding a wine glass requires a different hand position and drinking style than any other kind of container, so it’s a movement reserved only for non-work times. This gets my mind and body out of my work posture and helps release any post-commute tension.

Then, I head out to the backyard and take a tour of the garden. I see what’s blooming, what’s coming along, and I pluck any weeds I see. It takes about 10 minutes, and when I’m done, the change is complete. I walk back in the door with a new gait, a clear(er) mind, and a smile. I’m ready to relax and enjoy the evening without needing to zone out.

Easy Rituals to Set the Stage for Relaxation:

• Play some music. (Whether it’s Twisted Sister or Brahms is up to you.)
• Change your clothes.
• Eat or drink something.
• Take a walk or go for a jog.
• Play with a child or a pet.
• Meditate.
• Sit for a few minutes in a quiet room.
• Take 100 deep breaths with your eyes closed.